Are there any regrets?

Smokeless Tobacco

I know a man who severely regrets having taken his first dip of snuff. He says he has tried to quit many times and yet never succeeds. He would give almost anything to go back in time and eliminate that addiction from his life – simply by never getting started. It’s too late for that, but it is not too late to prevent someone else from making the same mistake.

I wish someone would form a ‘Reach the Kids’ program. I can see that organization setting up speaking engagements in schools around the area. The speakers would be young men and old men alike who have suffered from the habit of ‘dipping snuff’.

They may have suffered financially. The kids need to know how much it’s really going to cost them to accept a ‘free dip’ from a friend. Over the years, the total amount of their addiction could have become thousands of dollars. Someone needs to tell those kids how many T.V. sets and VCR’s they could have bought with that same money or how many payments they could have made on a nice car. When the cost is put in practical terms, it makes a person sit up and take notice.

It may have cost them dates and friendships. Some girls may have never dated them because they think it’s a disgusting habit. Who wants to kiss someone with that kind of stuff in their mouth? Some may have gone out for one date and been turned off by the habitual spitting. It may have caused lots of relationship problems. Someone needs to tell them about the ongoing agony of nagging parents or spouses who keep trying to get them to quit.

They may have suffered the agony of a cancer operation. Perhaps someone needs to tell them about the mouth sores and the fear of cancer. Do they need to know how high the medical bills can go on cancer operations?

You see, their friends are not going to tell them all these things. They are just going to reach out and offer them a bit of their own pleasure, without any warnings whatsoever. Once the innocent one is hooked, do those friends help pay for the habit? Do they pay the hospital bills? Do they find them new friends to replace the ones they really wanted? Do they play peacemaker in the home and keep things cool?

Nope. They just offer them their ‘first dip’ and take no responsibility for everything else that is going to take place after that. Friends don’t stick around to ease the pain of regrets. They just keep influencing other friends to do the same thing they are doing. They don’t mean to do any harm. They are not the ones who are going to prevent more innocent ones from becoming addicted to ‘smokeless tobacco’. Are you?

Have you ever influenced someone to step into a full blown addiction? Do you regret that influence you had in their lives? Can you undo what you have done? Can you sort of ‘make up for it’ by keeping someone else from getting started? Will you?

You could at least write down your regrets on paper and let someone else use your ‘testimony’ to warn innocent kids not to mess with that stuff. You could put your words on a cassette tape and let it circulate in schools all over the country. Someone could help you do that, if you would be willing to try. Could a few hours of your time be worth saving someone years of regret?

If you were bold enough to do so, you could tell your story in front of a video camera and let someone else distribute your warning to many kids everywhere. They just need to hear common, everyday people saying, "I wish I had never started!" That’s all it takes, in writing, on cassette, in video form or in person.

Why waste your regrets? Why not make something good come out of a bad decision? To do nothing is another bad decision. Every time you remember these words and every time you decide to do nothing – you are making one bad decision after another. You can do something to make a difference in a child’s life! Will you?

If nothing else, you could simply talk to someone on the phone or in person and tell them your story. Let them take what they hear and put it into words in any way that they can. Let them do all the work – just do your part by letting them know how you feel. Let them pass your message on to those who need to hear it the most – the ones who have not yet taken their first step toward addiction and misery

You can add your name, your voice or your picture to any warning you want to give. You can also remain anonymous. Just give someone the details of your story and let them carry it to others without ever revealing your identity. That’s fine too. Just do something for those who don’t really know.

Don’t they deserve a chance to make the best possible decisions for their lives? If you bought a car, would you want the owner to hide the truth about the transmission which is starting to go bad? If you were about to take a medicine that had a potential deadly side effect, would you want anyone to let you in on that information? If you were buying a house that was full of termites, would you want someone to warn you? If a bridge had collapsed in the night, would you want someone to put out warning flares and keep you from plunging to your death?

Why not do the same for others? They have a right to know the truth? Don't they? If you know the truth, what should you do with it?

Regrets & Rewards

What three decisions do you regret the most in life?

Tell us about them – so that we can warn others.

We can write article after article about the things that people regret most in life. You may never be able to stand out in the highway flagging people down and warning them not to speed. But, we can do it in a round about way – with your story – if you are willing to share it.

Drinking

Do you regret ever taking your first drink? Tell us about it. Tell us what motivated or influenced you to take that drink. Tell us some of the horror stories which have come about in your life due to drinking. Do your part to let others know it’s not all ‘fun and games’ at a drinking party.

Smoking

Are you glad you took your first drag from a cigarette? Have you enjoyed the cost, the bad breath, the threat of cancer and heart problems? Have you enjoyed the nagging and the condemnation from others? Do you like to get defensive and angry with those who don’t understand? Do you enjoy the agony of not being able to smoke on a plane or in some other public place? Do you want your kids to take up the habit? Why not? Tell us something we can use to warn others with. We might be able to prevent a lot of misery with one little story – yours!

Abortion

Have you had an abortion? What did you go through in just making the decision to abort? How did you feel as you were submitting to the process? How did you feel afterwards? Did you hide the truth? Why? Have you ever told anyone yet? Why not? Do you ever regret that decision? Why? Do you ever wonder what they baby would have looked like? Do you ever wonder what kind of a future it could have had? Have you had any mental conflicts or emotional problems because of that decision? Would you do it over again if you had the choice? What would you say to others? Then, say it.

Pregnancy

Did you get pregnant before you got married? Did you adopt the baby out? Did you keep it? Do you regret the decisions which led to the pregnancy? Why? Was the pleasure worth it? Was it even pleasurable? Did you suffer any shame, remorse, or guilt over that event? Did others condemn you, shun you or make fun of you? Did you like any of that? If you had it to do all over again, what would you do? Would you like to see lots of other people go through what you’ve been through? Why not? Would you want them to know the truth about all that stuff? How are they going to know, if you don’t tell them? Are you willing to try? Then do it!

Drugs

Have any of these things created consequences which you wish you had never experienced? Can you retrace your steps and undo what has been done? Do you live with permanent scars of wrong decisions? Would you like to spare someone else the grief that you have gone through? Then – just do it. Be bold. Step out and take the first step.

Homosexual experiences

Have you ever let someone of the same sex mess around with you? Do you regret that? Why? What emotional pain have you endured because of it? Did you feel shame, remorse or guilt? Did you have bad dreams about it? Has it ruined your life in anyway? Did you ever fear getting aids? Have you ever wanted to warn others about the unseen things that can happen in such a relationship? What kept you from it? Do you like that kind of fear? Have you ever tried to initiate a same sex experience and have good reasons to regret it? Would you like to keep others from making the same stupid mistakes you made? Then do it – anonymously.

Has your bad temper ever gotten you into trouble? Has it messed up relationships or ruined your life in some other way? Did it ever lead to physical violence? Did you ever hurt someone you never intended to hurt? Did you ever cause permanent damage Did your temper and violence ever lead to criminal charges? ? Did your temper ever lead to someone’s death? Maybe you ought to tell us about it? Maybe someone else needs to know what it could possibly lead to years later if they don’t deal with it now. Would you like to cause something good to come out of your mistakes? Then start now – share your regrets. Give us the details and let us tell others. It’s worth a try.

Thousands of divorces are taking place every day. People are now accepting that as a fact and as a way of life. Divorce doesn’t sound so bad anymore. But, it can be bad sometimes, can’t it?

There are thousands of horror stories about the 'life after divorce’. Want to tell your version of what divorce led to? Did you suffer financially, mentally, or emotionally. Did your own family condemn you or reject you because of it. Did in-laws blame you and hate you for it. Did the grandparents suffer because of your decision? Did you regret the hurt and pain that caused them?

Did any of your kids hate you for allowing it to happen? Did they begin to rebel? Did that lead to drugs, immorality or drunken driving and accidents?

Did anyone take advantage of you in your divorced state? Financially? Morally? Were there any bad circumstances which were direct results of not being married anymore?

Did you ever wish you had never made that decision? Would it have been better to stay in a poor or bad marriage than to suffer all those consequences? Is there anything that others need to know before they make such a ‘wild step’ toward supposed freedom? Are you willing to be the voice that lets them know what they need to know? Why not? Would you like something good to come out of your bad decisions? Will the good just automatically happen? Do you think someone needs to make it happen? Who if not you?

Well, we’ve spell out lots of possibilities. Now, add your own and dare to speak up so that others can be informed and warned. Life is life. You are not the only one who has gone through such experiences. You are not the only one who has walked in such misery and agony and remorse or regrets. You are not the last one to ever go through those things either. Others are lined up to make the same mistakes. You can’t keep everyone from going down the same road you’ve gone down, but you can prevent some of them from making the same mistakes. Give it a try. You can make a difference in someone else’s life. If you can – then do it!